It's been a long time since I've written, and this article has been delayed, especially on the subject of Legends of the Small. So close on the heels of Pattern Recognition, I decided to make a compilation album for my label, Rehegoo Music, that would catch them up on my repertoire, with the goal of publishing it on Halloween. It would collect songs from Dialectical Observations and Pattern Recognition. It turned out to have eight songs from each. To make it extra special, I even remastered six of the songs from Dialectical Observations. The track list turned out thusly:
01. When Anchorage Became an Island - Remastered 2018
02. Man Seeking Cocoon (for NSA LTR) - Remastered 2018
03. Familial Germs - Remastered 2018
04. Gravity Time Power Love
05. Android with a God Complex
06. Fleeting Fractals - 2018
07. Otaku
08. Revel
09. Less Sinister Cousins - Remastered 2018
10. Heart of Hearts
11. Signor Fancypants
12. Movement (Alternate Spin) - Remastered 2018
13. Why Can't We Have Nice Things?
14. Butterflies on Ganymede
15. Reciprocal
16. Probing
I was very proud of how the track ordering turned out. I was very proud of the remastered songs, hoping they demonstrated my growth as a sound technician, and I was especially proud of how "Movement" turned out - I started over from scratch with that song, whereas the others I just adjusted the levels of the individual instrument tracks: volume, bass, treble, echo, reverb - that sort of thing. With "Movement," I combed through each track and adjusted the positions of certain notes, took out a synth all together, and adjusted the levels in my composing program, then as an AIF, then as an MP3. It was tedious, but definitely worth it, in my opinion. These remastered tracks would be exclusive to Rehegoo Music, and I thought they'd bite.
However, Rehegoo didn't want to publish any songs that had been published before, such as they did with Nothing Left To Lose, Parts 1 and 2, and even went as far as asking me to take down all of my previous works. I felt they were backing me, a non-exclusive artist, into an exclusivity corner. I made my stance clear, that I had worked too hard on my prior EPs and albums, and they said they understood. But suffice to say, they did not publish Legends of the Small.
But I'm getting ahead of myself. First, I emailed them the ZIP of Legends a couple of weeks before Halloween, and it wasn't downloaded. It turned out my contact was out of the office, and wouldn't be back until a couple of days before Halloween. When he returned, he told me there was no way they could publish it by then. But I had my heart set on Halloween, so I published it at my Patreon, hoping that Rehegoo would make it public later on - I really wanted those remastered tracks to be publicly available. Now, because Rehegoo has rejected it, it's exclusive to my Patreon. If you want to download a copy, you'll have to make the appropriate pledge. Remember that I don't collect pledges until I put out an EP or album, and you also get that release. I'm thinking the next one won't be until the Lunar New Year in February.
Now, I still really wanted to make those remastered tracks publicly available, so what to do? I toyed around with the idea of releasing them on an EP of their own, titled The Dialectical Sessions. I also thought of including them on the next album. Then I decided to go all-out and remaster the three remaining songs, and release a completely remastered edition of Dialectical Observations. So that's what I've been most recently working on. It'll be out on the Winter Solstice.
Since cementing the track list for Pattern Recognition, and amidst the remastering of songs for Legends of the Small, I'd been working on new songs, and now have a total of eight toward a new album. At a challenge from my step-dad to create a soundtrack to the Tennyson poem "Ulysses," I created something a bit different than before, and it's carried on in a lot of my recent work - neoclassical compositions more fitting for a soundtrack than a rock album. It's also carried over from the mostly strings arrangements of Pattern Recognition and the more neoclassical feel of both Dialectical and Pattern, except these songs have been largely acoustic. Then I wrote "Pulses Intertwined."
It was a definite switch from the material I'd been writing. Yes, I'd switched from the strings arrangements of Pattern back to the piano, but this brought me back to post-industrial territory, which I'd left for about a year. This felt in the same vein as "Fleeting Fractals," though it was more akin to "The Cloud Walkers." Actually, I felt it could be my next "Cloud Walkers," a piano-led post-industrial epic with metal and EDM elements. When I was promoting for Pattern, I felt I should send in "Android with a God Complex" to radio stations. Instead, on an impulse, I sent around "Pulses." They all played it, including stations that I had submitted to in the past and had never played my music before. I was uplifted, encouraged, and felt this could be my next popular song. After circulating for a while, I felt it should really be publicly accessible, and it seemed appropriate to release it as a single.
I chose November 30th for its release because it's a significant day for me: my brother shot and killed my father and step-mother twenty-three years ago. It still has quite an effect on me. This year, I was alone and isolated, out in the middle of nowhere while I was housesitting, and it felt like I cried for two days straight. I wanted to do something musically oriented to help me cope, though it didn't help much. Instead, I found myself trapped in my head, and dwelling on certain factors. My brother grew up fetishizing machines of death - guns and military equipment. He came to fantasize that he was a paramilitary soldier, and wanted me to be the same. He was abusive to "discipline" me. Meanwhile, he collected guns and ammo and military-oriented magazines. I'll admit, he was a disturbed individual - he was abusive in other ways. But I don't think his interests in guns and the military helped matters. And when he was sixteen, angry at my father for leaving our mother, and not getting along with my step-mother, he killed them. This event has informed my stance on gun control, especially when guns are so accessible to the mentally disturbed, which has resulted in so many mass shootings.
In my current environment, I've come to realize that not all individuals with such interests are mentally unhealthy. My step-father collects guns and keeps them in the house, and often watches documentaries on war and military machines. Hell, it seems almost as if everyone in Missouri has a gun. But the overproduction of guns - especially assault weapons whose entire purpose is to kill people - in this country disturbs me. We have more guns manufactured than children born in the United States every day. It makes me want to move to another country or, at the very least, another state. My goal is to move back to the Pacific Northwest, but for the meantime, because of certain factors, I'm stuck in Missouri, as an advocate of greater gun control, as much as it's opposed by those around me.
I have released the single Pulses Intertwined in dedication of victims and survivors of gun violence. It is now available at Amazon, Google Play, Apple Music and iTunes, Spotify, TIDAL, Deezer, YouTube and YouTube Music, iHeartRadio, and Napster. If you'd like to directly support me and my art, consider buying the single at my Snail Tunes store. Purchases include high-quality downloads in a format of your choosing - from standard MP3 to lossless audio - as well as unlimited streaming at Bandcamp and on the free-with-purchase Bandcamp app (both of which are great tools for discovering new or overlooked music). A three-track version, with two new songs in a similar vein, "Dark Highways" and "Pierced Heart," is also available to Patrons of my Patreon. Remember, pledges at my Patreon aren't collected until after I release a new EP or album, which I'm predicting won't be until February. And Dialectical Observations (Remastered) is now slated to be a reward for those pledging $10 USD or more.
I'd like to switch gears to discuss record labels, as mine just sent me two new contracts. When Legends of the Small was released, I was informed that Rehegoo Music would only be taking new songs, exclusively, and that non-exclusive artists, such as myself, would only be featured on the Rehegoo streaming platform. They've changed their policies drastically since I signed my initial contract. And the new contracts are designed to further diminish the advantages of being a non-exclusive artist and direct me toward exclusivity. I'm seeing no advantages to publishing through them under my current contract, and I'm wondering why I would send them any songs. My distributor that I currently publish independently through even offers more stores and streaming platforms. I'm thinking it's time I cut off my relationship with Rehegoo Music. This first experiment with a label, which I was reticent about in the first place, seems to be a failure. It doesn't mean I'm closed off to working with a label in the future, but right now I'm leaning toward the advice of Amanda Palmer: "Don't!" Anyway, I've promised to share with you my experiences as an independent artist, and this is looking to be a bad one.
Meanwhile, my inner snail must remain resilient and determined. I hope yours does the same.
Oh, I almost forgot to leave you with a little something special! Here's one my newest songs, "Pierced Heart," one of the two additional tracks on the extended Pulses Intertwined available at my Patreon. Enjoy! and good-bye for now.
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